President Michael S. Roth announced today that Wesleyan University will be saying goodbye to the Wesleyan cardinal and hello to Wes Squirrel!
Due to the overwhelming presence of squirrels on campus, and the decided lack of cardinals, the move just seemed to make sense. Plus, have you heard cardinals sing?
“Conn College’s mascot is the camel. Middlebury is the panthers. Bates is the bobcats. Colby is the mules,” said Kate Mullen, Associate Director of Athletics and Head Women’s Basketball Coach. “No offense to the lovely red bird, but Wesleyan needs a more ferocious mascot. Like the squirrel.”
Not everyone is happy with the change. Kari Weil, Director of the College of Letters and author of Thinking Animals: Why Animal Studies Now came to the cardinal’s defense: “The northern cardinal has been Wesleyan’s mascot since 1933. Not ferocious? Did you know the cardinal’s immune system suppresses the West Nile virus? And the flipside, during mating season, the males feed the females beak-to-beak. And then he sings to her. How sweet is that?”
If this news is troubling to you and you think we’ve gone completely nuts, please check the date.